The frustrations...

Today like any other wed. morning I arose to my alarm blaring at 5 a.m. calling me to get ready for work. The normal routine grab my clothes from the bedside next to me, my toothbrush, hairbrush and go to the other girls bathroom so i dont wake katy up. Normally after all of this i sit down for a devotional but today i sat on the couch and fell asleep for another 10 minutes. It's 5:30 and time for me to leave I grab my vitamins, my breakfast shake, bottle of water, purse, workout back, backpact, etc. (you get the point) I jump in my car and hit the key in the ignition and .... it won't start. Great. Well, actually i'd love to say this isn't a normal occurrence for me, but it is. I've had this car 4 years and never had a single problem with it. The problem is with me. See I hate stopping to get gas, so I normally wait until my tank is pretty low before I actually stop and fill it up. Yesterday I was running up to mission lubbock delivering some cans when the light went off and i thought i'll get gas on the way back home, which i didn't end up doing. I didn't have to use my car again until this morning, so I didn't think about it. So it's 5:30 i have to be at work in 10 minutes and there is no way i'll be on time, so i call in. I tell my shift manager that my car won't start i wont be able to make it! So, i come back in, lay back down told myself i'll get up at 8 go get gas and be at class at 9. I wake up at 8:30!!! I decide to still try to make it to class i run into our shed, grab the gas can, run to my car, pour it in, grab all my stuff, jump in the car stick the key in the ignition and..... NOTHING!!! ok, ok. I am a TA for the 9 o'clock class and the professor loves me. She's an amazing christian woman who advises me all the time on how to handle situations with youth, friends, family, my life, etc. I call her cell phone and tell her what happend she laughs at me, makes fun of me, and then tells me not to even worry about coming to class!!! sheww... ok. I come back inside. Think to myself, wow jessika, all of this chaos have you spent any time with the Lord? umm, no. So what do i read in Oswald Chambers today. It's all about having that time with the Lord. I loved this little piece "Get an inner chamber in which to pray where no one knows you are praying, shut the door and talk to God in secret. Have no other motive than to know your Father in heaven. It is impossible to conduct your life as a disciple without definite times of secret prayer" ~oswald chambers.
So I spend a few minutes with the Lord. Wisen up a tad and decide even though my next class isn't for at least and hour, let's get this gas thing figured out now. I get my roommates car, go to the gas station, get out, begin to pull out the gas nozel! Great i brought the wrong purse, the one without my wallet in it, because i'd switched purses last night for a banquet. Ok no big deal, i'm calm, the Lord had given me peace. I'll go back to the house and try this again! I go, i get the right purse, check to make sure it has the debit card, head back to the gas station. Get out and instinctively begin, FILLING UP MY ROOMMATES CAR!!! well about 8 dollars in i realize this! Ok, well hope that's a blessing to her today for letting me borrow her car. I fill up the gas can. Drive back home and begin filling up my car. The whole 2-3 gallons that our gas can is.
Alright I still have 40 or so minutes before I have to leave for class, so I come inside. Talk to my roommate some, read a little, browse around on fbook some, and talk to a couple of people on the horrible fbook chat, while pondering to myself what i should blog about today. Then, i go outside, get everything piled up in the car AGAIN. Stick the key in the ignition............ NOTHING!!!! ok about this time, my patience is getting thin. I find myself to be a pretty patient person. I'm not rash, i dont stress very easily, i'm very much a go with the flow type gal! But now this three times and my car not starting. On top of the CRUD i had to deal with on monday. Yesterday was my sabbath and it was supposed to make EVERYTHING BETTER. haha. hokay so. My car is not working. This is not the way this day was supposed to go! I'm supposed to go to campus, go to work, go to class, meet with my advisor because she found a way i could still graduate in december, go to free lunch at the wesley and fellowship with friends, come home finish up everything for youth, spend some time in prayer for tonights youth lesson, drive to go pick up a friend who is coming to youth with me tonight, drive out to pick up two of our youth, do youth, drive back on campus for a work meeting!!! Have you noticed all the driving yet? So about when all this hit me, is about the time, i got frustrated.
Then i came and i sat on the couch. I said Lord, I don't get it. I just don't get it. I'm stepping up to do battle. Don't you remember what I said on Sunday, shouldn't you be helping me MORE NOW!!
Then the gentle voice of my Father, the peace that calms my soul. "My ways are higher than your ways, my thoughts are higher than your thoughts."
Of course God i know that scripture, everyone does, Isaiah 55:9. I sat and thought and realized. Today I was inconvenienced, but noone was hurt. My professor got a good laugh, I'll have to email my other prof to get the notes, I'll get a ride to campus to talk to my advisor. I'll call some of the other adult youth leaders to pick up the students. I'll borrow a roommates car for youth. The things I felt so IMPORTANT. The thing so needed, my reliance on my car, and my ability to do the things I need to do, suddenly now sounds like stupidity and pride. God is my provider, He knows what i need, and if my car ain't workin' it means i dont need it. I have friends, helpers, Christian brothers and sisters, who are here to help when I need it and I have a God who is way bigger than a car not starting. I'm not sure why my car isn't working today, I can't tell you when it'll be fixed and it'll work again, but I know my God's ways are higher than mine, His thoughts are higher than mine.
It's good to be a child of God. It's good to know that no matter what goes wrong in this life, He is good, He loves me, He provides for me, He'll take care of me.
J. Tate