It is Saturday morning. This is college football.
I walked out to my car this morning with a light cool breeze rustling my hair and took a deep breath in to smell... college football.
I drove up to college station last night to spend the 3 day weekend relaxing with my best friend, doing laundry, shopping, studying, watching movies, going out to eat, and of course watching college football.
I'm not the typical girl that doesn't understand what's going on or the one that doen't care what team wins, i jump into the game cheering and hollering and loving every minute of it.
Don't worry this whole blog won't be about college football. :)
Yesterday on my drive up here I called one of my favorite people in the entire world, my friend kayce. Kayce throughout many times in my life speaks words of truth that open my eyes to things I've never noticed or thought about.
We started talking about my new job and all that I have struggled with and all the things God is teaching me through this new stage of my life. After a few minutes of talking she just starts laughing and says... "ya know most people in life say something to the effect of God send me anywhere just never send me to the depths of Africa among poverty and disease. Then there is you who says, God send me anywhere in the world, to africa, to where things are bad and the risk is high, but please don't send me to a little rural town in the public school system"
I of course had to laugh as well and later as I was reflecting, I was convicted. Kayce was right. I'll go to the jungles, to the bush, i'll sleep on the ground, I'll hug babies with aids, I'll minister to murderers of thousands, cast out demons out of tormented people, but Lord please not Liberty, Tx in the public school system.
I need to note here that I do thoroughly enjoy my job, I am more than thankful for it, and my goodness I couldn't be more happy w/ having all of the spiritual mentors, frieds, and family I'm surrounded by in Liberty.
I've told God I'll go anywhere, but then when anywhere didn't mean (my version of) "full time ministry"; I lost my total surrender, I lost my complete willingness.
I've had to reconstruct what "full time ministry" really is. I've had to really search my heart and say "will I really go ANYWHERE". I've had to repent.
In a public school in Liberty, TX God is really opening my eyes to what He really wants from me, to what really matters to Him, to what absolute surrender actually is, and the truth that being in "full time ministry" isn't wht job you have, but rather how you live your life. A full time minister is a missionary, a pastor, a school teacher, a doctor, an accountant. Anyone who will fully surrender their life to minister Jesus Christ.