The closer I become to our Holy Spirit the more I realize that I don't know near as much as I thought I did, however I have access to way more than I ever imagined. Yesterday I was trying to open my classroom door with the remote lock to my car. It took me a good thirty seconds to realize that this was not the correct key to open this door.
In life there are many doors I want to open. There are dreams we have, things we want to accomplish, things we just want to happen, there's things God has placed in our heart to do, and things He's asked us to do. Trying to accomplish these things on my own in life is much like trying to open my classroom with a car key, it's confusing when you can't figure out why it won't open, it's frustrating when you know it's possible but aren't getting the right results, and it's so inconvenient when you know it could have been accomplished, easier, quicker, and with less irritation.
As I walked into my classroom after opening the door with the correct key, I talked to my Helper. How many times is He whispering "Jessika, you're using the wrong key"? I'm not just speaking of trying to get into my class, but in many of life's endeavors. He's whispering, "Do it this way", "Say it like this", "Don't say that at all", "Go this way", "Put your money here", "Talk to this person", etc.
Humility isn't about expressing my lack of knowledge in myself, it isn't claiming "I'm just an ole' sinner", it isn't about telling you how wretched I am, it isn't about me condemning myself for the many places I miss it on a day to day basis. Humility is about submitting to His guidance, surrendering my desires to His, it's about trusting Him and disregarding myself. You see the false humility that says I'm just no good and there's nothing I can do to change it, I'm just a wretch and I keep making the same mistakes, I'm the low one on the totem pole, that false humility leaves no room for Holy Spirit to come be who He wants to be in you and ultimately keeps your focus on YOU which is the opposite of humility.
You may make dumb decisions, but the One in you wants to make wise decisions for you. You may be a terrible wretch, but He wants to lead you in the path of righteousness. The truth is that as long as you keep focusing on you, you will keep being what you are. I don't want to be what my flesh is, I want to be what He is. It's no longer about what weaknesses I have, it's about turning my focus on His ability to be my strength. It's no longer about how I make dumb decisions, about Him giving me access to all of HIS wisdom. It's no longer about how this person did this, or did that, this person likes me or doesn't like me, because His favor is what gives me what I need.
True humility takes all of the limits off of your life because now your focus is on Him inside of you who has no limits and no boundaries. Die to self, trust in Him, that's humility.
Be Blessed, J. Tate