To My Girls...

Over the years I have accumulated spiritual daughters, sisters, nieces, etc. from Lubbock, Louisiana, Liberty, and a few other various regions.Some of these I'm very close to and talk to everyday, some just once a week, and some just every few months. Many of them call me Mom or Mommy, some call me PJ for Pastor Jessika (just because they know I don't like it), several have nicknames for me based off of some scatter brained thing I once said. Some of them I'm allowed to pour into because they eagerly accept correction and advice, then there are some who push so hard against it. Some text me, call me, email me, facebook me, and some wait for me to contact them, but no matter how close or how far, no matter how much time we spend together and talk, each and every girl matters to me. I have laughed with them, wept for them, prayed for them, I love them.

This morning I sat down at my computer and I came across an article ( It's titled, "I don't wait anymore". It so summed up something that has been the cry of my heart for years. Let me explain.

I'm 26 years old and I'm single. No, it does not bother me. In fact, I rarely give thought to it at all until someone brings it up, which happens... OFTEN. I know I know, you think I'd be a great match for so and so. I know I know, I have "so much to offer a guy". I know I know, you're so "on fire for God" you should get married.  I understand these people are well meaning individuals that just think they understand what I "want" or even "need".

Sure I've dated some and even thought I'd marry at one point, but I made the decision not to. Oh there's lots of reasons for why, but what really matters is where it brought me to.  You see in college we used to sing this song and it went like this, "wake me up from this American dream, I want to be with you". I would sing that from the depths of who I am and I'd cry out to God, LORD, I JUST WANT TO BE WITH YOU. I want to know you intimately. I"m not so concerned with the spouse, 2.5 kids, 3 bedroom house, and a car. I. WANT. YOU. And if you come, with those things, GREAT. If not, GREAT.

The truth is.... I have a lover and He has captured my heart. Somewhere in these last 10 years of serving Jesus, He stole every bit of my heart. He has it. He is my Best Friend and I am madly in love with Him. I've learned to let Him speak to me, heal me, love me, comfort me, and I so enjoy just being with Him. I love that when I come home I can go into my room and think about no one else, but Him. I love that I can travel the world sharing about Him at a moments notice and not have to get "affairs in order".  I love that I can see His glory covering the earth as He sends me to other nations. What a blessing to be the Beloved of the Creator.

Do not get me wrong. I am not anti-marriage. I think marriage is incredible, what a beautiful picture of Jesus and the church. What an amazing thing to learn humility and love for another person to that depth and of course I love kids!  Maybe one day I'll get married if the right guy comes along. What I'm saying is... that marriage is not the greatest desire of my heart, nor is it the greatest desire of my heart for my kids. My GREATEST DESIRE for my children is for them to fall head over heels in love with the One who gave His life for them. The Savior of their soul. The Creator of the Universe. Jesus Christ.

Then, if they meet a well intentioned, Jesus loving, humble, Godly young man, I will be the proudest spiritual momma on the PLANET, but only if I've seen them love Him first. He is the center, He is the focus, there is no more important thing than serving Jesus, accepting Jesus, and loving Jesus.

Oh it doesn't bother me one bit when people "know someone" and often I tease right along with them, but my prayer for my daughters is that they'd first crave the love of Jesus above any man. I pray they would see the opportunity and blessing in singleness until that man does come along.

If you've spent any time with me over the last two months or so and we got on the subject of teenagers there's a good chance you know what I've been studying. I have been pouring over articles, statistics, papers and such about the issues of sex and dating in our young people. I've looked at statistics on pornography, sexting, sex, dating, pregnancy, molestation, marriage, and more. It's such a huge issue on my heart that sometime in the spring we will be hosting a girl's conference that I highly encourage you send your young woman to be a part of, and I'll have more details soon, but remember as you're encouraging the young women in your life that life should not be spent waiting. Life should be spent loving and living.

Fall in love with Jesus and live a life of adventure with Him.

Be Blessed, J. Tate